You don’t have to be an English major to write successful letters to your pen pal.

Write from your heart and use your creativity. Here are a few suggestions for writing snail mail:

• Begin each message with a pleasant greeting. Hand-write your letter as neatly as you can and always use your own words.
• Respond first to the news and information that your pen pal shared in his or her last message. But don’t just answer your pals questions, ask a few of your own so you can keep the letters flowing between you.
• If you have just started corresponding, tell your pen pal a little bit about yourself and why you think you would be a great pen pal.
• Share information about the things that are going on in your life at the moment.
• Try to keep your letter short enough that it can be read in one sitting.
• Pace the revelation of personal information. Remember that telling too much about your life too soon could scare away a new penfriend.
• Avoid controversial topics – at least in the beginning of your relationship.
• End each letter with a note with encouragement for your pen pal to reply. (“I look forward to hearing from you soon” or something similar would be appropriate.)

Finally, use nice or unique writing paper and envelope. Address it neatly, legible and correctly by hand. Don’t print it off the computer or type. It should look personal. Clearly put your return address on the envelope. Put the stamp on straight and send it airmail.

Here are some suggestions to help your child start and maintain a lasting pen pal relationship.

Types of Pen Pals

~~When most people think of having a pen pal, they picture kids in far away places that do not even know how to speak English. You can certainly have an international penpal. It’s a great way to learn all about a new country, their customs, and what they do for fun. Your child may also opt for a pen pal in his/her same country. Perhaps they will find someone that they have a lot in common with, and while distance keeps them apart, they feel close knowing they are from the same country.

~~In the modern world of the internet, pen pal exchanges can take on many forms. Traditional letter writing (through the postal service) is still quite popular but your child might also opt for a pen pal exchange via email.

~~Don’t limit your child to pen paling only with individuals in your native language. Using translation services (such as Google translate), you can effectively correspond with just about anyone in any language.

Communicating with a Pen Pal

~~It is important to respond quickly to a pen pal because they are waiting to hear from your child. Depending on where your child’s friend is located, it could take weeks for her to receive a reply, so answering quickly is a good idea.

~~Letters should be happy and bright, especially in the beginning. No one wants to get mail that is depressing and someone is always complaining. Remember that your child’s pen pal wants to learn about them and know what exciting things are going on in their life.

~~When your child begins writing a letter, make sure he/she never gives out personal information. It is a good idea for you to scan your child’s letters to make sure that they are appropriate. Refer to these safety guidelines.

~~Some countries do not tolerate religious letters or letters with political content, and chances are the letter may not make it to the intended person, if government officials find it offensive to their country.

~~If any subject matter makes you and/or your child uncomfortable when receiving correspondence from a pen pal, drop the communication immediately. There is no need to send a letter back stating that you are terminating the friendship. In this case, less correspondence is better.

Regardless of where you obtain your pen pal references, it is very important that you stay in the whole process with your child, until he/she has become very comfortable with the details. Again, make sure they never give out personal information and always scan your child’s letters to make sure that they are appropriate.

Having a penpal can be a profound lifetime experience with an individual’s knowledge and understanding of cultures and people greatly enhanced through the simple exchange of thoughts and feelings through letter writing. Before you (or your child) secures a relationship with a penpal it is wise to consider the following:

On the internet, you cannot easily verify the real identity and origin of people that are corresponding with. You must be vigilant and never give your address or phone number if you are not sure to know the real identity of your penpal.

When using a penpal finding service, never include your address or phone number. Moreover, don’t include your e-mail address, because it could be collected very quickly by bad-minded people (risk = spam).

NEVER reply to a message that offers a job, money or an invitation, because it’s ALWAYS a swindle.

NEVER send money to someone you’ve met on the Internet, or give them your bank account number, or social security number, etc. Real friends don’t ask for money.

Additionally, read the following: 419 scam (The penpal scam)

Welcome to easy Penpals. Having a pen pal is a truly exciting experience. Some relationships start off great and trickle away, while others can be pen pals for years and years. The key to having a good pen pal friend is to be a great pen pal friend. This site is dedicated to providing individuals with information on the pen pal experience: helping you to find the right pen pal exchange site and keeping you informed you on safe internet practices.